23 Nov

What is mine is mine alone!

Have you ever heard the saying, “Everything you have is something you wanted at one time?” Now, whether you’re happy you got it is another thing altogether, I suppose that is why wishes are to be made carefully.  For this blog, I focus a lot on well-being rather than all the things that are going wrong.  Why? Because that is my point of view, we see things not as they are, but as we are-and I see everything as a possibility.

Back to “the things.” As I was saying, the things in our lives are all things that we hoped for, wished for, prayed for, worked for at some point in time.  The same could be said for some of the people, perhaps.  In the last ten years or so, people who may be jealous of those things or those people have been pegged as *haters*.  Envious shade-throwers who cannot stand to see you shine.  Sometimes, they get to you and sometimes they try to mirror your steps to success-often taking shortcuts.  Sometimes they achieve your same successes, and sometimes they will surpass you in achievement.  This can really get to you.  When you’ve cried, prayed, worked, strived, sacrificed and fought towards a goal, and someone else just sashays right past you, pointing and laughing at your struggle, you can grow bitter and resentful of them.  Don’t.

The Yiddish have this word, “bashert,” and it means destiny.  Often times when referring to soul mates (during marriages) they use the phrase bashert is bashert, or destiny is destiny.  The notion means that what should be, shall be because it is meant.  I liked it, so I’ve adopted it to my life.  What is meant for you, is meant for you and you alone.  No one else can fit in YOUR things, because they were made for you.  They may steal them, but at best they will be a stunning imitation.  Life has a way of achieving balance all its own, so there is no need for me to exert any energy worried about those that plot against me.  I rented a car once, and the driver that picked me up was a 70 year old man, so of course we talked.  He gave me beautiful advice, that will likely always stay with me, he said:

  • Never go a day without love and happiness.  Life is too short not to be happy.  He said the less he worried about life, the less he had to.
  • Don’t be in a hurry.  He said marriage will come, family will come, money will come.  In its own time, enjoy where I am right now.
  • Friends don’t hurt.  He said I need to surround myself with things that are uplifting and also to be uplifting to others.  Heaven in your heart brings peace to your mind.

Don’t worry…slow down…uplift.  You can’t go wrong with this, can you?   There are bible verses that say the same things in Matthew, Ecclesiastes, and Philppians, respectively.  I wonder if there are things across various religious with these messages.  I do believe that anxiety is an affliction of the faithless.  That is not to say that it is permanent, or that the lack of faith is permanent-but when we lose faith (in ourselves, in others, in life) we become consumed with worry and doubt.  We must always hold on to hope of bashert, of destiny.  That things will work out in their own time and that where we are is where we are supposed to be.  Slow down.  Those that surpass us, may be doing so for now, but that may be for the best, we should congratulate them because that may be their sole source of happiness, whereas you may have many.  Never wish ill on anyone, and if you find yourself doing so-ask yourself what’s going on with YOU that you can’t uplift.  If it’s meant for you, then its yours.

Have you found this to be true in your own life?  Have you seen things “work out” as they should in their own time??


One Response to “Meant”

  1. GG November 23, 2010 at 5:36 pm #

    Absolutely. I see it day after day. When I was in my early twenties and just coming into my adulthood, I lost my faith for awhile. I didn’t stop believing in God or a Higher Power, but I became disillusioned with Christianity as it had been taught to me. As a result of me “losing my religion”, I was completely overcome with anxiety and fear and I lived this way for several years until I rediscovered God just in a different context. I learned a few things from this experience: 1) Even when you feel completely lost, if you hang on the even the teeniest amount of faith, you WILL come out of the dark 2) We shouldn’t be afraid or feel that we will miss out on anything in life because what is meant for us is meant for us and can’t be taken away 3) Questioning, rediscovering, struggling – we have to go through these things so that we can reach the truth of who we are and tear down all the pretenses. It’s actually a blessing and not a curse to be faced with challenges and learn to have faith that you’ll come through them.

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